Hello everyone:

Here are some ideas from my book Suddenly Single:

Women whose husbands have found greener pastures also need to be savvy with financial matters. An ex-husband-to-be can frequently hide assets so that his new nest can be well-feathered. Beware of the hubby who drops hints that he is building a nest egg, especially if it seems that someone else will be sitting on the eggs. Keep your ears and eyes open; state laws can help you with some of these assets but you need a good lawyer to help get you your share (yes, I know that some people consider “good” and “lawyer” to be mutually exclusive words, but I mean you need to find someone who will help uncover those hidden pots of gold and get you the money your years with an adulterous spouse deserve). Does he suddenly receive financial statements from accounts with institutions you know nothing about?  That could very well be a hidden asset, sister!

To find the lawyer who would be the most helpful in getting your share of the family assets, you do not necessarily need someone who will “kick butt” in the court room; you need someone who knows the laws in your state. While it might feel good to find a lawyer who will make your ex squirm, an attorney who really knows his or her stuff is actually more of an asset. If it makes you feel any better, just be aware that, as Erma Brombeck always said, the grass is always greener over the septic tank. I would add: and you know what that is full of.

Best,

Dr. Sheri